Monday, 28 December 2015

Missing breastfeeding

My little lady is now 15 months. I breastfed until she was just over a year. After an extremely difficult first week, where I was tempted to give up but 
if I'm honest stubbornness and pride drove me to continue I persisted. After that I generally had a pretty good run at it. I had a plentiful supply of milk. The baby was hungry. I never had mastitis or thrush. I had a blocked duct once, which resolved after 24 hours of heat and massage.

I know that nostalgia can add a rose tint to anything. But this week I've really been missing breast feeding. I was a bit emotional about it all at around 11 months, when considering how long to breastfeed for. After much careful consideration and observation, I decided to stop just after a year and this worked well, both both baby and I. This past week my daughter has had "extreme teething" and a horrible viral dose of hand/foot/mouth (some areas of skin were so bad antibiotics were required). These two things in such a short space of time have really prompted some sort of grief for not being able to comfort her in this special way, by "putting her on". Of course I've been able to do other things such as hugging, holding, singing etc but it's just not the same!

Has anyone else ever felt like this?

Now that we've moved on from the breast-feeding groups, there doesn't seem to be a natural forum to reflect on the end of this phase of our lives, and to acknowledge that loss. 

I'd love to know if anyone else has had a similar experience? And as I reflect, I think of the warmest, happiest breast feeds. Mine was when dd's first smile came just after a feed. Can you remember yours?

Hoping to hear if others miss breastfeeding, how they cope with this and lots of happy stories!

Cheerio for now
first time mammy

No comments:

Post a Comment